Baseball Begins!

It's been a long time since my last post. But some things just stir up enough in me that make it worth coming back to it at this point.

How 'bout them Mets huh!?! Off to a roaring start again this year, and just like every year since Pedro Martinez has been on our club, or at least in the clubhouse being rehabbed every day of the G D season, he is AGAIN, on the DL. I don't even want to google how much Pedro is making, it would just seem to improbable that it could make me more happy than I already am about the start of the season.

If I had any money to spend I would go out and buy a Mets hat. And a Royals hat. I am committing myself to the KC Royals this year. They are on pace for a 162-0 season, and by golly, I think they can do it. If they lose a game, I'll be the first to admit they fooled me. Because right now they look like the next coming of the 96 Bulls. Cross sport reference? Sure.

But back to the Mets. A couple things to watch for in the coming week: Oliver Perez had a great start in his first appearance, no earned runs, so that obviously means he will have a HORRENDOUS outing in his next start. I mean like the second coming of Rick Ankiel on the mound type bad, but only for an inning or two, then he'll calm down and the Mighty Mets will try and rally from 10 down in the 3rd.

Also, I'm setting the over/under on Mike Wise being sent down at 2 weeks, and I'm taking the under. Is there somewhere I can wager on that? Vegas maybe? Reno? I'll make some calls and get back to you.

And finally, our next series is against the Braves. And damnit, their good again. But Mike Hampton just went down with injury again for the 100th time in the last 100 months, so at least he won't hit a home run. BUT! I am predicting we get 2/3 from them, in Atlanta, on TBS. Suck it Ted Turner.

C-Webb to the Rescue

Golden State must have Championships in mind, as we all know by now Chris Webber is making his triumphant return to the Warriors. Really? What's next, PJ Carlesimo's gonna bring back Latrell? Seattle could damn sure need use his scoring and his D, and since Nellie and his nemesis are getting the band together, PJ might as well follow suit.

Mid-season trades and signings can be huge for a team right on the verge of being a playoff team, and/or a contender. Look at what the Laker's did. Bring Pau in to the mix automatically makes them a contender. If Bynum can come back this year they can put a lineup on the floor of Bynum, Gasol, Odom, Kobe, and D-Fish. If they can mesh well on the court and if Pau can learn the triangle, they're a serious contender right away.

But you know, Golden State obviously is only one 35 year old, slow, non-defensive playing, wily old vet away from being a better team. C-Webb will help in some ways, scoring and passing, but doesn't it seem like that's not their biggest weakness. What about post D? What about defense in general, even if they just had one stopper on the team, just one, that could guard the other teams' best player they might MIGHT stand a chance in the playoffs in the long run. When I think C-Webb I think pump pass-fake from the top of the key into a soft jumper. I don't think stopper.

Good luck with all that Nellie.

Please Declare

You know that big white guy for North Carolina, you know, the one that is going to win player of the year? The one that gets more points from the free throw line than he does from the field? The guy that, if there is a God in the heavens, will declare to enter the NBA draft this year, his junior year, and NOT GET PICKED IN THE FIRST ROUND (sweet serenity!)!

I can't stand Hansbrough. He scores tons of points and gets tons of rebounds, and never closes his mouth. He's a board certified member of the Kevin Johnson club.

Sadly, I have to admit he is a great college player. I don't know how, I don't know how he gets 20 and 10 a game because it doesn't seem like he has any real skill outside of being big, insane, and able to hit free-throws. Can he shoot from outside the key? No. Can he dribble? No. Does he have good footwork? Were Milli Vanilli great singers?

He is the perfect Bob Knight player. He rebounds and fouls and gets fouled and sets solid screens. He's Mark Madsen on steroids.

If someone picks him in the lottery next year I will never mention that team by name from then on. His ceiling is Scott Pollard. Maybe a poor man's Gary Trent. I honestly think he would have a better shot of making it in the NFL than in the NBA. But that's just my opinion. If someone picked Joel Freeland two years ago, someone has to pick Hansbrough.

The sad thing is he plays for North Carolina who is undefeated and will most likely make it all the way to the final four this year. Which means we have to hear about how great he is for the next three months, ad nausea. And what's even sadder, he has to know that he's not going to be squat in the league, so you know he's coming back to UNC for his Sr. year. Why leave the castle you're the king of when you're only gonna be the joker in the next court.

On the bright side, at least it makes for a good villain to root against. He and the Lakers in this year's playoffs. But really, once they sign Chris Webber to replace Bynum for the next two months, we won't have to worry about the purple and gold for much to longer.

Isaiah is Safe!

This just in: Isaiah Thomas was given the key to the city.

The owner says his job is safe. Thank god! And I thought the NBA was going to be all about winning and "what have you done for me lately?" It's good to see an organization stick with someone who has brought them no where.

That's all.

College Dreams

I was watching the Texas Tech v. Butler game last night and thought to myself, "I don't think I have ever seen a Bob Knight player smile..." Why do kids still go play for this guy? It's like singing up to have your life critiqued by Simon Cowell.

Another thought, how many players has Bob Knight ushered into the NBA? I know he is all about graduating players, which is commendable, but if I'm a top prospect, I gotta think I'm more worried about making millions than I am about finishing a degree in four years. Maybe he has put a lot of players in the league, I'll have to look into it. Calbert Chaney is the last one that comes to mind. He had a stellar career.

Another thought while watching the Butler game. If you watched every college game and listened to every announcer you would believe that at least one player on every team has the stuff to make it to the next level. Hubert Davis said that in the right system the Butler gaurd, Graves, could be the next Steve Nash. WOW. He also said that a kid named Green had no weaknesses after he hit a long 3. Really? None? Is that why he's at Butler? Oh.

But it's great, that's why I love the college game, everyone has potential. Everyone COULD have a breakout year, everyone in SEC COULD accept cars from Boosters. There are endless possibilities in college.

Every year a team like Butler or Southern Illinois can make a run at the final four. I watched a Southern Illinois game and thought that they might be the best TEAM I have seen play in a long time. It's like watching the Spurs play. They have this kid with the last name Mullins, I prayed he was the son of Chris -- he even has the hair --, but he wasn't, and all this kid does is steal the ball. That's it. He makes steals and smart passes. And he played the whole game. It's awesome.

Down low the have a guy named Falker who is like the illegitimate child of Etan Thomas and the guy who works the desk where I work out. All he does is rebound and score and set huge screens.

Gus the Bust just fumbled a snap on fourth and one at the goal line to end the game. I hate him. There was gonna be more, but it will have to wait till my anger subsides...

2 Heroes in Sports

If you hit .222 with more strikeouts and hits, your worst year since your first year in the majors, you better take whatever contract you can get so you can prove that your not totally washed up. Hello, Andruw Jones.

My two least favorite people in sports right now are Scott Boras and Isaiah Thomas. Scott Boras first tried to break the DOW with A-Rod's contract, now he is telling people that Jones won't accept a one-year deal. Really? How's the Dominican League sound? They would probably sign him to a life-time contract.

Scott Boras asking for more than a one-year deal from anyone besides the Royals is like Thomas throwing the team out of practice on Monday. What a desperation move. I've been on teams in high school where the players just gave up on the coach because we thought he was worth about as much as the Nike Cortez's he wore on his feet, and throwing your team out of practice is a last ditch effort. It's you saying to the world, "I've lost all control and respect of my players!"

Thomas is a train-wreck right now. How do you let Marbury start again? How do you let him play again? Thomas is like one of those bullies on the playground that got beat up by the nerd and now has to prove to everyone, all the time, just how tough he is. He's a joke. They should have known what he was going to do to the Knicks after what he did to the CBA. Where's the CBA you ask? Exactly.

RANT

I just had a horrible day at work, compounded by the fact that I think someone who says she
"lives in the UK" but is selling a car in Portland is trying to swindle people on Craigslist, so I think it's time for another rant. Nothing is sacred.

My brother-in-law told me that I should mention hockey in my blog a little more, if I ever get around to writing this blog again. So here it is:

Hockey? Did it start yet? The season I mean? How do you make the playoffs in hockey? Is it by how many times you win or by how many points you score for losing and tying? I don't get it. The other thing I don't get, who cares? WHO CARES ABOUT HOCKEY? Literally speaking, no one. No one actually cares about hockey save for those who are under 13 and live in cold weather places. You know no one cares about hockey when the season starts and no one knows about it. Not even ESPN talked about it on opening day. It was an afterthought. ESPN shows more cup-stacking championships then they do hockey games. That's how you know no one ACTUALLY cares. Another sign no one cares about your sport, when the only thing anyone talks about after games is how many fights there were. Which actually doesn't involve a hockey stick or a puck. Now, if the fights did include those two things, man, I would tune in every night.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Good to get that out.

Next, the NBA is a glorious thing. The Nuggets are the most injured team in the world save my St. Louis Rams. Why in the world the Nugg's thought it was a good idea to re-sign or give an extension to Nene blows my mind. I can't remember a time in his career where he hasn't been hurt or recovering or on his way towards getting hurt. That was like letting your heroin addicted drummer come back for the world tour after he skipped out on rehab early, hoping, just hoping that he would be able to kick the habit. Not gonna happen. The best thing, they signed Steven Hunter to back up the oft-injured Camby-man and now Hunter is on the shelf, along with Chucky Atkins who was somehow supposed to play point this year. GIVE ME A BREAK!

The Celtics are out of their mind. They are 7-0 and killing people like the Patriots. I love it. But I have one question? Did anyone think long-term when they picked up Allen and Garnett in return for their next 100 first round draft picks and almost every other player on their roster? What happens when these three retire in 3 years? I'll tell you, a 10-72 season with Big Baby and Rajon chucking up 50 shots a game and another 10 years without the playoffs. They are so far over the salary cap they make the Knicks look fiscally responsible. How can this be missed?

The Portland Trailblazers and the NBA are STILL marketing Greg Oden! He isn't going to play for a year! One whole year. What about Brandon Roy? Hell, I would like the Blazers to market the Big Monkey Joe P. rather than Greg Oden. His commercial is hilarious on ESPN, but whats gonna be even more hilarious is if the guy stinks it up when his career actually begins. What's more? The freaking Blaze-show is 4-4! Holy hell! And without Oden or D-Miles. Can I get some love for the D-Miles bandwagon? The guy is like 21 and has been in the league since I was in middle school it seems! How is that possible? How is this guy already POTENTIALLY washed up? Oh yeah, Microfracture. Right. Big men are marketable.

Stephon Marbury is the NBA's Peter Griffin. Isaiah Thomas is Quagmire.

The thing I love most about the NBA is that every year team's count on player's who have never produced to produce. To name a few that still find themselves in starting lineups: Kwame Brown, Darko, Mike Dunleavy. When I watch the Lakers play and see Kwame running up and down the floor unable to do anything else well besides run up and down the floor, it makes me wonder if Michael Jordan was doing acid when he picked him with the number one pick, and then it makes me wonder if teams only play him because he is a former number one pick and they think, "for the love of God, Michael Jordan picked him, he's got to have some kinda hidden talent!"

Stephon Marbury once had a show on Fox where he interviewed people. Take that in.

The NFC West is the worst division in football. The Niners are about to start Trent Dilfer again. Shaun Alexander is mailing it in when he plays, and now Maurice Morris is starting. The Cardinals are still the Cardinals, no matter who much pre-season hype they get. And the Rams, even though reasonably healthy right now, still are playing with what has to be their 4th string offensive and defensive lines. The NFC West is so bad that after the Rams beat the hell out of the Saints on Sunday for their first win of the season I believed with all my heart that if they could just win 5 more games, giving them a 6-10 record, they have an outside shot of making the playoffs as the Division Champs. The NFC West is so bad that my friend Jon named his fantasy team "NFC WEST" as a joke. Granted, the joke was about as bad as the division, but you get the point.

Ricky Williams is allowed to play again for the Dolphins and John Beck is going to start at qb this week for the winless Dolphins. I say trade everyone and relocate. Let's do this whole scrapping the season right and just tank the whole damn franchise. The marquee name on their team right now? Ted Ginn, Jr. Unbelievable.

The Falcons picked up Byron Cankles Leftwich to replace Joey Heisman. They benched Joey and started Leftwich who got hurt in his first game. You gotta love it. You just have to love a team doing everything it can to not start Joey but still having to start him. He must feel great about himself. I heard Jeff George was talking about a comeback. He was a former number 1 pick, maybe he can still muster up a little something. I think they should make a rule that if you are a number one pick you should have always have a job if you want one in your respective sport. They deserve it. Jeff George's Madden Ratings (as I remember them) back when he played: 99 ThPw 81 ThAcc 65 AWR. He was the Vick of his day minus the Speed. 51 Spd.

For the love everything unholy. I just looked at the ESPN.com NBA page and there is a headline that reads, "Marbury to the Blazers?" I vomited through my nose when I read that. I'm not even gonna click on that link. If the Blazers sign Stephon Marbury I will forfeit my Blazer Fan Membership. Effective Immediately.

Little Romeo plays for USC.

Jay Bilas said: "Kevin Love is so good because he is always open."

Steven Jackson writes a fantasy blog for ESPN.com. The dude has 30 more fantasy points than Rueben Droughns.

Ok, I broke down and clicked on the article. They aren't going to trade for him. There is a God.

I think I got it all out. For now. This is what happens when you are moving to LA in a month and can't think about anything else beyond that.

The movie "Like Mike" just came on, I am going to gauge my eyes out.